My Life

The past few days I've been having and existential meltdown/life crisis. I feel stressed about where I want to live, what I want to do, etc. etc. I feel like if I had just gone ahead and moved here, or had a real job, I wouldn't be stressed at all, because I had made a decision. But because my life here is so temporary, I feel like I'm unattached to anything and it is scary. On one hand I kind of feel like I would be letting people down if I didn't stay in New York for a while, and at the same time though I want to go home and live in Austin, I don't know what I would do there. However, after talking to Roy and talking to Whitney I feel a lot better. I also feel like I don't have to make any decisions and perhaps I should just coast my way through the end of 2007. My internship is over at the end of September and then I am vacationing in Costa Rica in October, which leaves about 2 1/2 months of uncertainty left for the year. Perhaps I could pay a visit to my cousins and good 'ol Steph in San Francisco for a few weeks and maybe vacation somewhere warm in December, the rest of the time playing with friends all over Texas. I guess I figure I don't really have to work this year. (Although I may hate myself come tax time...) I can live cheaply and figure out what I want to do. Maybe I will get inspired on vacation, or by family or friends. I hope that by writing this I will stop worrying and start really enjoying the moment.